Posts tagged as ‘drawings’
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Today’s Word is “Blij”
"Blij" (adj): Glad, happy, pleased, cheerful, merry, joyful
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A Conversation With Marc
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Speaking of Christmas
It’s time to get all those prescription orders together and see what kind of bounty you can serve yourself up during the weeks leading up to Christmas. I happen to be going to Singapore, so I’m going to need 18 hours worth of ambien just get my passport stamped from one place to the other (very exciting). Hopefully I won’t take all my clothes off on the plane and start speaking German to the man sitting next me.
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Gary – 1; Magic 0.
Gary – the pussy of all pussies. This cat takes no longer than 15 minutes to wake up, take a shit, or decide which way he wants to turn. He doesn’t do anything by himself but has somehow kicked the ass of the neighbor’s cat, Magic, who tried to come into the house. This cat got TOE UP but my gay, indoor, tuxedo cat.
WHAT ELSE COULD GO WRONG?
There’s only three real weeks left until the holidays and we all know it’s going to fly by in an alcoholic blur, so get your shopping done early so there’s more money for booze!
West Third Street Holiday
Thursday, December 7th
Stores open until 10:00 pm.
Abbott Kinney Street Fair
Friday, December 8th
Stores open until 10:00 pm
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(kinda) Re-Opens Today!">Mitsuwa (kinda) Re-Opens Today!
And not a day too soon. The upside-down shampoo bottle trick doesn’t really work for more than a couple of days, let alone two weeks, which is how long Mitsuwa has been closed for the much needed renovations to both the food court and the grocery store. Unfortunately, after just coming back from a visit, it appears that the food court is still closed and the grocery store is limitedly open but with new scanners for the checkout girls. Let’s take a look and together we can challenge happiness everyday.
THE STORY SO FAR
Mitsuwa the grocery store re-opens today, but here is the image of the great “Sorry for the Inconvenience” poster they put up.
TAMPOPO RAMEN STALLED TO BE REPLACED
Rumor has it that the very popular “Tampopo” ramen is being replaced by a ramen chain called Santouka Ramen which is already installed in the Mitswa Costa Ramen.
JAPANESE VIDEO RENTAL STORE ADDED
What used to be a random room/hole that was really “picture machine-adjacent” at the entrance of the marketplace has been replaced with a Video Rental store. I know I don’t speak the language, but I like options.
EVERYTHING ELSE THE SAME PLUS ONE GIANT HELLO KITTY
I should’ve taken a picture, but I swear that retarded cop WAS EVERYWHERE. Like I’m going to steal shampoo and Yakult™.
All the other stores were exactly the same except the TRENDY appliance store had a massive Hello Kitty in cellophane and a bow in the front of it that I don’t remember seeing, AND I’M PRETTY SURE I WOULD NOTICE THAT.
More pictures to come when they fully reopen.
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There was a week in 1998 I thought I was a racist
Uh, funny story… I was shopping in San Francisco literally days before Christmas trying to get parking in the O’Farell garage smack in the middle of Union Square in really bad traffic. Of course, some one ended up cutting me off, but then THEY started honking at ME, trying to push me out of the road where I could not go. What am I supposed to assume you want me to do when I can’t go anywhere? All I could do was channel the spirits to come up with an answer and the spirits told me to stick up my middle finger and yell “FUCK YOU BITCH, WHERE DO YOU WANT ME TO GO YOU ALREADY CUT ME OFF, DUMBASS!”. That’s when the black woman driving the other car without plates got out and punched me in the face through my car window full-fisted with matching gold hair, earrings, and fingernails while my ex-boyfriend did nothing (though that’s kind of what he did in the general boyfriend department). Then she got back in her car and sped off so the whole thing was completely pointless and I ended up hating black people for like a week. I think after a week, I just kinda forgot about the whole thing so now I’m “not a racist” again.YOU KNEW I HAD TO BRING IT UP
Now we all know Nintendo Wii is coming out a week from Sunday (two days after that crazy waffle iron comes out that everyone else wants. I, of course, always have to be different and keep my kitchen appliances and my gaming devices in separate rooms.) My opinions aside, I just really don’t want to see anyone to GET BEAT DOWN NEXT WEEK. Leave the console wars to the corporations, the stockholders, and the media because the fact of the matter is, most people getting a console next week don’t deserve one (i.e.: the guys who paid a homeless man to stand in line in Japan who got mauled by the mob, Paris Hilton, and probably “Turtle” in an episode of Entourage). And if your friend gets one before you do, just take comfort in knowing a first generation will probably melt in a couple of weeks, so you can just relax and enjoy the time you have with it and your friend instead of spreading rumors about him or her out of jealous rage. It’s not healthy and we all have to remember that at the end of the day these are toys that we’re talking about.
OPTIONAL READING
If you actually want to know why I really want a Nintendo Wii, I’ll tell you why: I’m a Screamer. That means when I play videogames, I have a tendency to scream very loudly (cops came over to my friend’s house once after reports came in that the neighbors thought there was a domestic disturbance while I was playing GTA). The Nintendo Wii gives me an opportunity to yelp and squeak complete with bodily spasms without looking like I wasn’t born with enough chromosomes. Also I like cute, “girl” games, which I’m proud to say that I play because it just so happens I’M A FRIGGIN’ GIRL. So I want one, I pre-ordered one, and I will sit here patiently until I get one.
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My house stays really cold in the winter
It’s 72º outside and it’s thirty inside. What kind of stupid math is that? I have to wear socks and shoes, a scarf, AND a hat just to walk around my house, which makes me look real dumb when I actually leave the house and see people riding their bikes without their shirts on.
MORE WAYS TO STAY DEPRESSED
The mp3 of a KQED call-in forum show is available featuring Dave Eggers as well as “the protagonist” of his new book, Valentino Achak Deng. Valentino is a Sudanese refugee that was also featured in the documentary the Lost Boys of the Sudan (which I am netflixing as we speak, you should too) and let me tell you,he has been through SOME SHIT. Unfortunately, I don’t know what all that shit is because most of the people who called in quickly commended Valentino for being an inspiration before going on THEIR righteous OPINIONS about the state of world affairs to date. I’m talking to you stay-at-home moms, and retired physician dude who said that Valentino’s survival was nothing more than a story of the “cause du jour” (uh, dude, you can say “No offense” at the beginnging of a sentence, but it doesn’t mean I’m not really going to take offense to it). I can’t really get that upset, “call-in” shows just begs that kind of behavior.
Nevertheless it was a very interesting interview to listen to while I made my eggs.
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Will Sell Gary For Website Renewal
.. And, parking tickets, and medical bills, and car insurance, and credit card bils. Holy shit, folks, I am so mother-fucking broke I’m thinking of starting Whitney’s fast money-making idea, “www.lonelyeurasianprincess.com”. It’s mostly just video footage of me washing dishes and smoking because that’s bascially all I do at home. But hey, for $50.00 a month you can see a unique, only slight-jaded, Asian-individual do mundane tasks around the house and garden. That’s a steal when you think of the convenience it will save you watching it from the comfort of your home instead of hiring one of us as your personal house slave.DOWN WITH WHITEY!
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putting out fires
All of today and probably the rest of the monthly. A week’s worth of bad decisions and bad attitude are catching up with me.